Self examination and honesty

Current Reading:  In between books right now

Current Listening:  “Dark Paradise” – Lana Del Rey

So to say the world is in chaos right now is the understatement of 2020.  All of this madness, for lack of a better word, has me thinking.  Today,  my best friend, did one of the bravest things a person can do. He told his truth.   He came out as bi-sexual on Twitter. He is a semi-public figure because of what he does as his side-business. His name is known in his industry and, honestly, I can’t be prouder of him.  We have known each other for almost twenty years. I’ve known his orientation for years so it wasn’t this huge surprise, at least not to me. I knew.  But, let’s pull the camera back a minute.

His ownership got my gears turning. For the longest time, I kept to myself about my own sexuality. Most of my reasons had to do with my child and my ex-husband.  I love my daughter and I want her to see that it’s okay to live your truths. To be honest with yourself and everyone around you. If the people around you can’t accept that well, they’re not your people.  Times are changing.  So, here we go.

I’m bi-sexual. 

Still here? Good. Let’s keep it moving.  There are so many stigmas around being bi-sexual. “But Sandra, you’re married to a guy, how can you be?”  Uh, marriage and sexuality aren’t mutually exclusive. You can love who you love and still be in a hetero partnership. That’s the reality.  The truth is, there are many men and women today who are in similar situations.   Some people think being bisexual means you aren’t gay. No, that’s not true either. To me it just means that I find both sexes attractive for a variety of reasons. There’s no harm or foul in that. There’s nothing -wrong- with it either. Anyone that tells you so or that ‘you’ll outgrow it’ is full of shit.

So, why share this on my author blog?  Couldn’t it be a form of professional suicide? Well, that depends on what camp you’re from.  If you’re from the camp that would judge or harm someone for this? Uh, there’s the door,  for the love of god,  please let it hit you in the ass on the way out.  The LGBTQ community is growing in the writing industry.  The work is out there and it is -beautiful-, let me tell you.  (Don’t believe me? Check out the book Girls of Paper and Fire.  Or Once & Future. Or The Conqueror’s series. Just to name a few.)  If I can be part of that community going forward, it’s where I want to be.

Secondly, I’m tired of hiding. I’m tired of giving people this perception of me rather than the reality.  

 So the message I want to leave people with today is this:

Be you. Be gloriously, fabulously you.  Go after whoever or whatever makes you happy. 

Happy Pride Month!